I love Halloween. It is a fun time of year, and it is in my favorite season. So I planned for it this year. I made preparations. I had candy. I had a fresh bulb in the porch light and I was ready. I enjoy all the little trick-or-treaters, getting to see their costumes and seeing them be happy. I appreciate all their work at getting dressed up and I enjoy paying them for their efforts in the form of their favorite currency: candy.
I have my bowl of candy, and everything ready and the doorbell rings. One Hannah Montana and one GI Joe. I hand them a couple of candy bars and some milk duds. The little girls says, “The neighbor folks said to ask you for some candy from them too, they didn’t have any.” Huh. “What the Heck” I think to myself. But not being one to dash the hopes of a small kid I throw in a couple for the neighbors too. Maybe they are just unprepared. Back to watching my movie and waiting for the doorbell to ring bringing even more little ghouls for me to bestow my gift of candy on. Several minutes later the doorbell summons me again. This time I have a zombie and a cheerleader. I pay up after making them go through the traditional routine. The Zombie says, “when we asked the neighbors, they said you would give us their candy too.” Again, not wanting to be a scrooge I fork over my neighbor’s share, all the while thinking , “what is their deal.” I ask the Cheerleader, and not just any cheerleader, but apparently Claire from Heroes, if the neighbors had their porch light on. She said that they did and that they answered the door right away but then told them to come see me for the candy. WTF? Back to my movie, twenty minutes later, again paged to the door, A Werewolf, a pirate, and a refrigerator with a severed head in the freezer, accost me demanding candy. I oblige and once again am informed that my apparently shiftless neighbor sent them my way for his portion as well. I pay the toll. “My neighbor has a job” I think to myself, “if he doesn't want to give out candy why is the light on?”.
Two or three more episodes like this and my candy bowl is getting low. I am accustomed to the usual Halloween crowd, but this has been doubling my expenditures. I just don’t have the heart to tell the kids that I cannot give out candy for both me and the neighbors. He is costing me money, and putting a burden on me that I did not consent to, nor that I can afford. Candy is expensive and although I am prepared to play the game, I do not want to pay for the neighbor while he still gets to play. I head over there in the lull between kiddos, my candy bowl almost completely empty, determined to get him to quit attracting people to his house, or for him to go get a bag of candy so that he can pay me back. Then I remembered…it all became clear:
j/k I don’t ever get Kids at the house, not enough people out where I live, my neighbors are good folks and to my knowledge are not Obama supporters. I just thought this was a good story illustrating some points, and maybe a little funny.
-KOOK
